Such a weird day so full of nostalgia.

I think it’s partly the weather, partly the lack of sleep, partly the fact that mercury is no longer in retrograde. But my subconscious keeps triggering extensive memories full of scent and emotion of past lives I’ve lived.

Cloudy October days, when I still lived at home, had soccer games in the morning, and had all of late afternoon to sprawl out and read my Gossip Girl books, munching on candy corn, the yellowy glow of a full, warm home.

The cold days, this time last year exactly, when everything fell apart. My job. My apartment. My relationship.

Dark, winter evenings when I still lived in Long Beach and Mason lived in Huntington. When we lived off of a diet of Trader Joe’s and SushiYa – since I was an on again, off again pescatarian-vegan. He’d chill with his roommates and I’d lay on the carpeted floor and read.

Those gloomy, depressing days of living in the college dorms, half a decade ago, when we all passed around the same copy of Twilight.

Such a weird day. Life is so wonderful as it is now, but all I can remember is the past. All these things I once knew so well. It’s a reminder of how far I’ve come. And that I need to keep my hope strong, that everything will turn out as it’s supposed to. The only thing I have control over  is that I do my best, and do better each day passing.

Current Music Obsession: