I’m having one of those days…Actually I’m having a really good day, but a DGAF day. I feel like I don’t care what people think of me anymore.
So here’s a list of all the questionable things that I like to do:
1. Drunk Texting: Because the shear joy that I get while I do it is equivalent to the shear terror next morning when I realize what I’ve done.
2. Being Blunt: Because I don’t have a filter and I don’t know where to get one. I don’t judge people and I like talking about what’s really going on. I’m horrible at BS-ing.
3. Going out: Because sitting at home watching Netflix isn’t that fun to me (unless I’m exhausted, like tonight). 2/3 of the time I’m sober. And for goodness sakes, I’m 24. Who cares what I do with my free time? I work HARD, I eat well-ish, I work out, I sleep enough-ish, I see my family constantly, I’m not in debt. I’m proud of who I am at 24 and that’s all that matters.
3(PartTwo). Going Out: The real problems arise, though, when friends get upset that I haven’t invited them out with me. I just like to go out and I’ll invite anyone who’s around me. I mean, I’ll invited strangers. DGAF. I don’t purposefully leave people out and the guilt is starting to make life too complicated.
I’ve been thinking a lot about all of this. I know if I stopped running my mouth, if I kept my opinions to myself, if I stopped prying, if I just piped down a little – my life would simplify. I wouldn’t ever piss people off. I would turn into one of those pleasant people who seem like they carry the spirit of Mother Teresa in their pocket. But I’ve realized that for all of us, our flaws and our strengths are two sides to the same coin. True, if I kept my mouth shut, It would cut the drama to zilch. But lordy life wouldn’t be as sweet. I wouldn’t have so many wonderful, intimate relationships.
At this point in my life, I’m so grateful for everything I’ve been blessed with, and the joy in my life isn’t mitigated by what I don’t have.