If you’re friends with me on any form of social media, you’ve probably been bombarded with optimistic, self-help e-cards and quotes. And if you’re friends with me in real-life, you’ve probably been bombarded with discussions about being a single, independent woman who don’t need no man.

Clearly, I’m in the aftershocks of a breakup.

I want to take a minute to say how wonderful my ex-Hunny is. He’s kind, loving, intelligent, hard working… and overwhelmingly handsome. Not to mention the man can grow a beard unlike any other. (A talent I really didn’t appreciate when we were together.)

But here’s the thing, as much as I loved him and he loved me, the compatibility was off. It’s like, both oil and water are freaking great. Had they not been inanimate objects, they probably would have loved each other just as deeply as my ex-lover and I did. But ultimately, despite the love, he needs to find the whiskey to his water, and I need to find the Moroccan to my oil. At 23, almost 24, I had no idea I was the oil. I would have bet money on me being the vodka to his water. Or maybe even the vodka to his whiskey — given you really shouldn’t mix the two, but inevitably, on the best nights (read: traumatizing) you do.

So now, I’m two weeks from my 24th birthday, single, and starting a new project. I want to figure out who I am and what I want.

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